One Year and Seven Days

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Your Spell

Such a terrible thing the way I feel without you.

you, the light that used to bring me happiness

you, the one I have ever wanted

you, who I once consider unreachable... 

touching you was a dream.

lonely I am because you aren't here.

lonely because I don't have you

lonely because I can never ever have you again.

lonely because I know I can never ever again 

find someone that can take my breath away like you did.

and my pain is stronger than me

overtakes all my beign...

your lips I crave, and so I crave the warmth

from your body, and to rest in your arms.

to carress you, and lose myself into your eyes

you should know how much I love you.

even when you burped I loved.

deep inside, the only thing I wanted was to be yours

your magic was strong, it took me to heaven

and back,  and it has also sinked me in the fire 

of pain.  break it, break the spell you put on me

so I can live without you, so I can love, so I can

burry my feelings for you and move on.

------------------------------------------------- SPC

Ugly

 I walk in the shadows of depression
like a phoenix I need to resurect.
so I find my oun diversion to lift up my spirits
it doesn't matter anyways
you are not here.

I look into peoples faces, not to find you
but to forget you.
I look into their faces whit the hope to find
the one who will conquer my heart.
none of them seem good enough.

they are not good enough.

what to do? where to go? who to find?
but the only one I think about its you.
and you are not here.

you are there.  with her
and I am jealous.
her beauty overtrows many.
her skin, looks so white and softh
her eyes are beautiful and big
even I can't look away from them.
her smile its stunning as well
it takes my rage away, but it replaces it
with something else.

so the mirror hates me more than ever
what I see I don't like.
what I try to change, doesn't change
what I try to enhance, doesn't help.
ugly I feel, Ugly.
Ugly I must be.  even if I look my best,
compared to her I still ugly.
ugly outside, ugly inside.

because I should not be jealous,
because I should not have this unconfortable
feeling on my chest.
because I should be happy for you
because I should not be wanting to be her...
--------------------------
SPC / Winter Wolf

You were all that I ever wanted.

Does hiding the truth is like a lie?

does it means that hiding my feelings could mean that I am hiding from the world?

hiding from the truth? hiding from you?

I was hiding from you, I admit it.  inside I feel I need to keep hiding,

inside I feel I have to scream, let it all out loud, but there are consequences

and my personal consequence is not what worries me anymore.

your happiness I will be disturbing just because I need to move on.

and I'm a fool, an Idiot, I am brainless, because just like you I also fall too fast

and believe in ever and forever. 

Just like you I'm a dreamer, just like you I let my mind wander

in the deepest of the worst and the better of the best. 

just like you I wonder in unknown worlds, like the one you showed me

when I least expected. and you took me deeper in it, making me forget

about the rest, about reality; because with you all my problems went away

the storms of my life came to an end with you. I was living something I only dreamed about

and it took me a while to believe that something so abstract, so intangible could be this real.

Forgive me, since I never told you that You were all  I ever wanted.

You were good to me as well, you healed me from years or disappointment 

you took me away from tornadoes and ferocious lions,
the closest I have feel loved and safe in your arms,

there are so many things I still need to say...

So I'll move forward,

to my own pace,

but you always will have a special place in my heart. 

When in Sorrow

Every living thing must go through pain in order to heal, no matter how long it takes
I should stop lamenting about my lost,
since with every defeat there is always something gain
the trophy of wisdom, the treasure of the past
that will be perserved in my heart for future reference;
and today you are my companion;
instead of consoling me, you laugh and seem full of joy
for the tears in my heart.
I want to deny it.
I want to cut your roots and leave you behind
so you can die, and then I will be the one pointing and laughing...
I am talking about the pain I feel inside, the pain once you felt
when love said no.

Soon I will find again happiness, leaving you in the past
a sad memory, and you will beg to come back to me
I will feed you, I will take care of you, I will stay with you
and you know it, and yet you fear my departure...
so soon, you'll say.
I will be back, and you know it.
then I'll wait for you.
that is the old promise we make to each other
every time I heal, every time I go.

Hesitant & Insecure

Hesitant & Insecure
Dec. 23,09


Tell me you are not letting me go just yet,

tell me that you are not tired of every romantic thing I say,

let me know that every caress I give you its ok

because the past is hunting me

and my fears transform into tears.

Tell me you are not going to be the same

because I need you, and I have being waiting for so long...

and because I'm been hurt, and need back my faith

I will love you to death if I could

and the end of the world will not matter, since my love will survive,

but my heart in pieces wants someone to put it back together.

Someone that demosntrates me love and lets me know that I can trusth again,

someone that will be my bridge over the turbulent water

someone that will heal the wounds caused by ferocious lions.

I hesitate on opening my heart so don't just tell me you are going to be there, act

Grudge

Saturday, March 13, 2010

I remember when everything was all right
before this started again, and my heart sank in pain
my grudge is chasing, hunting, killing, tearing apart
help me get rid of it.

my grudge is small, but powerful
my grudge loves me more than you do
my grudge promises me that will never leave me alone
and that when you are gone, he will be there for me, reminding me
of the pain I should feel, because that is his demand
I have tried to like it
I have tried to live with it
I have tried to get rid of it
but it always comes back as a bumerang
he has not tell me his name yet, but I know it has one.

I call and call trying to reach for help!
my days are running slow without you and hours transform
into ages, Im loosing my mind and when there is not answer
Im lost, I cry when it rains because my tears mix with water and fools the world.
and yet, I have hope, I have hope that my grudge will set me free
that you finally understand that love its not something you ignore
that you run away from, that you hide, that you deny, that bores you

and I keep on calling, but there is not answer.

Much Better

Much Better

Dec 26, 2009



Honestly I feel so much better since you came into my life

it took too long to find you

It took too long for you to find me

maybe it was not that long, but it seems like it

since my hopes in finding love were gone.

scary is to lose you,

but I will let you go if I have to.

I rather not think about it.

I need you as you can't imagine

I love you stonger than I thought I ever could.



Sleep by your side is somenthng I want.

I dream about you every nigth, and every day

because even when I am awake my mind takes me back to you

my heart has finally peace of mind,

so fondle me, and kiss me all you want, I can never get enough

because you are the one I dreamed, you are the one I have been waiting for

let me heal your heart, that like mine was destroyed

let me care for your wounds, throw away your fears, and calm those tears

that disturbed your nights.



SPC

Cold

So lonely I feel, so lonely I've become
without you I can't be
without you I am myself no more
I wonder what will you think
when you discover the truth
that one it is me
thinking of you
because your lips I miss
oh... how much I desire from you received a kiss again...
because I miss how safe I was in your arms.
how your voice and your caresses made me
so happy, so calm, you tamed the beast inside of me
and now we both are dying without your love.
I'm begging you, because I need you
do not be so cold
remember all our love
because the best days I had, I had them with you.
here is a secret I can share, and I hope you know it.
all those places we went have from me and you a story
I can't never replaced
so happy you made me, that I cannot visit them again
it will remind me of my former happyness and it will
make me feel depressed because you are not there.
forming new memories will not be the same.
the places will lost the meaning once you gave them


SPWolf

July 24, 2010

Rain never hurt anyone

The rain was heavy, all soaked from head to toe we ran seeking cover, but then I stop to a single thought.
rain never hurt anyone. huh?- you said. -I said, rain never hurt anyone.- well yes but... - nothing came to your mind, for the very first time you had nothing to say, no refutation, and I was amazed. -yes it is true, rain never hurt anyone, so we better just walk. - you took my hand and we walked, others ran trying to escape the cold water that attacked as if were millions of thousands of bees stinging their fragile skin, thunders roared with anger, and lightning illuminated the gray sky. Suddenly the street was empty, just us strolling, holding hands, soaked. - I love you- I said. - and I love you too- you said, so tenderly you kissed me. We were meant to be together, I just knew it. unfortunately I never had the guts to tell you. that is what hurts me the most. so today I am back here, in the same street we were, under a rain similar to the one that was falling that day holding your favorite flowers. I am here to tell you that I need you, that this should not have to be this way, it should not, it should not. so I will stay here, and I will keep on coming back until lightning strikes again in the same place we were, the exact spot you were standing. because we are meant to be together, I guess I was wrong when I said that rain never hurt anyone

The Things you do for love

~The things you do for Love~

Ahh, the things you do for love...you jump up and down just to call her attentionyou call constantly just to hear her voiceyou log in, log out and then long in again
you look thought her pictures and the more you look
the more you convince yourself of her beauty
a beauty you never imagineda beauty that you admire, and desire

ahh the things you do for loveyou break hearts, you dissapoint peoplebecause your world is her, and nothing else mattersyou dream about her, eat, breath, live for herand even in your lonely nights and days you find pleasurethinking all those things you want to do to her.because you want to love her, as no one else has, as no one else can
her perfume is on your bed, and her scent makes you feel in heaven.what a pleasure, what an unbelivable moment.ahh, the things you do for love;you steal, you lie, you tell the truthyou reinvent yourself just to impress heryou become polite, you are her knightyou hug her to feel her closer andevery kiss is passionate.

you are lost in her eyes and yet you are not scared if you don't find your path again
Stay, you said, stay with me always, stay all night, all day.
Now, you take her places that are uknown to herto mesmerize her eyes, and her amusement and wonder makes you happy.
She loves you, she loves you so much, she can never imagine her life without youshe loves you so much than even if you don't say it she still will know you love her as well. she loves you deeply; so deep she wants to give herself to you and finally you take her.

yours is my love, my soul, my passion, my bodyand if I could give you my life, I would.
she is yours, and you are hers.the world can end now;
because you have each other.she cares, she loves,
she becomes a burdenyou cannot stand her pressence anymore.

ahh the things you do for love, those are crazy things.
things that are lost when feelings are not the same so you jump, you scream, you die and live again, you do everything you can just to make her love you.
but her heart is now closed, her love belongs to someone else a shadow that follows her every step.
would you keep your hopes up?would you give up? and move on?would you do all of those things you do for love?
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July 19-2010